~{Fast, not fast enough}~

Yesterday was my 9th Anniversary.  In my family, that means an automatic free dinner pass - no cooking for mama!  Oh, I love those breaks!  We gathered up the kids and headed to our new favorite place for Cajun food.  
(mmmm crawfish)

While we were in the entry-way, waiting for our table, all three boys asked for quarters to get some candy. Monkey-Man got his favorite - Skittles.  He's jumping around on their once-red-now-dark-burgundy rug, popping one candy in his mouth at a time.  I'm checking in on facebook, watching the boys out of the corner of my eye.  All of a sudden in my peripheral I see a green Skittle pop out of Monkey-Man's little hand, fly up in the air, and roll about 5 feet on that nasty rug.  

{Now the next portion is all in slow motion:}

Monkey-Man and I both leap up at the same instant to get that coveted candy.  As I'm lunging, I'm also saying, "No, no, no!"  It must have been in that deep, slow motion voice because Monkey-Man didn't pause.  I'm watching him pick up that nasty little Skittle, the whole time words like E. coli, Salmonella, and Streptocaucus are going through my mind.  I grabbed his hand before it reached his mouth, but that stinker popped it in and chewed before I could wrangle it away.  I groaned, and sunk down in my chair, clearly defeated and disgusted.  

Then I hear laughter.  Wild laughter from the man sitting two seats down.  He told me that I'm fast, but not fast enough.  He wished he had a video camera to record the whole thing and watch over and over because it tickled him so much.  Then he reassured me that I probably ate even worse things when I was his age.  Doubtful - I'm not, nor was I ever a nasty little boy.

This, despite appearances, is a nasty little boy: